December 18, 2025

“The best way to lead people into the future is to connect with them deeply in the present.” James Kouzes

Here we are!

A week until Christmas. There are probably a few (many) leaders who are still searching for the perfect present for those they lead.

What followers really want from their leaders in the holiday season is not more noise, emails, events, or gift cards. Followers crave leadership presence. The energy source that powers leadership presence is connection.

Connection, in essence, is a “plug‑in” that powers leadership presence. The many electronic devices we use in all parts of our lives today are only as beneficial to all of us as their level of power or energy. That energy comes from a connection to a power source. The cell phone doesn’t power up because it wasn’t plugged in or connected to its powersource . Your laptop doesn’t charge before a major presentation losing power because a faulty cord didn’t provide a connection.The same lack of power in leadership prescence is a lack of connection. The same is true of our connections with those we lead and serve. When the connections are tight, the power is tremendous. Suppose we, in our leadership practice, don’t intentionally connect with those we lead. In that case, our relationship with them loses its power, requiring extra work to restore the connection or, in some cases, leading to it going dead. In an organization, this could be called burnout or disengagement. Either way, the organization and your leadership struggle. Many social scientists report that we are in the most connected generation, yet the most isolated. A deeper look at this puzzle about connection requires us to reconsider technological connection and personal connection .” Likes “don’t provide connection or fulfillment; many social scientists report they create anxiety and unrealistic comparisons. The point for leaders is to recognize that a power source in connection can enhance their leadership presence. Still, leaders must choose to build meaningful, authentic human connections. This is an essential imperative for leadership practice today: make connections to engage followers and build high-performance cultures that people love to work in.

This Thursday’s Leadership Insight addresses our continuing series on what followers really want from their leaders: leadership presence. This week’s topic will be how an intentional, authentic practice of connection powers leadership presence. First, we consider what a genuine connection is not and what it is . Seven leadership practices of authentic connection are shared.

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I am an obsessive student of how themes, systems, and patterns connect to leadership across all types of organizations. ” One of the themes/patterns of effective /outstanding leadership is a practice of intentionally choosing to connect, develop, and nourish relationships. John Maxwell, on Minute with Maxwell -Relationships, stated that relationships are the key to our being a “plus “who adds value to others or a” minus” who doesn’t. Any leader in any organization, reflecting on their leadership practice, understands that their success or failure depends on building connections and relationships. Relationships are built and flourish or are destroyed based on many factors. These factors are empathy, trust, candor, integrity, and courage, to name a few. The starting point of all relationships is connection.

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The holiday season provides a film that is a stellar example of the lack of connection and the power of authentic connection that many of us have experienced. In National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation, Clark Griswold spends days stapling 25,000 twinkle lights to his house, only to stand in the yard with his family in the cold, and nothing happens. The bulbs are fine, the wiring is elaborate, and the display is impressive-looking but dark with no power . Clark, like many of us or “that neighbor, “goes a bit wild. This horrible (in his mind) situation is remedied by Clark’s wife, who quietly flips the hidden switch (called a breaker) in the garage and actually connects the power. The whole thing lights up.EllenGriswald intentionally created a connection.

Leaders can be just like Clark. They work hard, plan big, and build elaborate “displays, agendas, programs, initiatives, but if they never truly connect with their people, their leadership presence does not “turn on.” Presence is not how much effort a leader expends; it is the felt experience others have when the “power cord” of connection is plugged into real people, in real time.

What is not a connection practice?

1. Connection is not just about being around people more.
2. Connection is not drive‑by compliments with no curiosity.
3. Connection is not mass emails with “Dear team” and no human follow-up.
4. Connection is not holiday events where leaders stay at the head table and never enter real conversation.

What an authentic connection looks like :

What leadership presence really is

Leadership presence is defined as the ability to connect authentically, build confidence in others, and inspire them into action. It is less about title or charisma and more about how a leader’s words, demeanor, and attention make people feel seen, safe, and significant in the moments that matter.

Researchers and practitioners note that presence is enhanced by an authentic and respectful connection with others that builds trust, engagement, and commitment, especially in times of uncertainty or change. In other words, presence is not the spotlight on the leader; it is the atmosphere a leader creates that allows others to think, contribute, and thrive.

An intentional practice of connection is the real “plug‑in to the energy source .”
Leadership experts are clear: presence rests on connection. One definition of leadership presence highlights that its underlying structure is “the ability to connect” authentically so that people feel motivated and inspired. Another perspective describes leadership presence as the powerful connection a leader makes with those in their sphere of influence, expressed through word, deed, and core values.

Authentic connection is the experience of being known, valued, and joined around something that matters. At work, connection shows up when people feel their leaders understand their reality, care about their well-being, and actively support their growth and success.When leaders connect, emotionally, relationally, and purposefully, people grant them the trust and followership needed to walk into an unknown future together.

Research on engaging, person-centered leadership shows that when leaders intentionally connect by improving feedback, aligning work to people’s strengths, and fostering supportive relationships, employees report higher engagement, more happiness at work, stronger trust, and lower burnout. Studies by Gallup on employee engagement also show that when people feel a sense of purpose, value, and strong relational ties to their managers, they are far more likely to stay, perform, and go the extra mile.This data is especially reflected among Gen Z and Millennial workers.

Seven ways to intentionally connect this season

Here are seven practical “plug-in” practices you can use to enhance your leadership presence during the holidays (and beyond):

1. Slow down and give undivided attention Block short, focused one-on-ones where your phone is down, your laptop is closed, and your only agenda is, “How are you really doing right now?” Research on leadership presence emphasizes present listening as much as speaking and tuning in to others’ thoughts and feelings. Feeling heard is one of the fastest paths to trust, engagement, and psychological safety.
2. Name what you see and appreciate specifically. Move beyond “good job” to authentic, behavior-based recognition: “When you stayed late to help the new team member, you protected our quality and showed real care.” Studies on engaging, strengths-based leadership show that specific feedback, aligned with people’s contributions and strengths, increases work engagement and performance. Specificity tells people, “I really see you,” which is the bedrock of connection.
3. Ask curious questions about their world, not just their work. Use questions like, “What’s one thing bringing you joy this season?” or “What’s one stressor I might not see from my seat?” Leaders who connect personally and show interest in people’s broader lives foster stronger bonds and higher trust. Servant‑leadership research finds that when leaders show genuine care for the whole person, employees become more emotionally involved, loyal, and productive.
4. Acknowledge the season’s pressures and adjust expectations. Connection deepens when leaders demonstrate empathy by adjusting workloads, deadlines, or coverage plans in light of holiday realities. Studies of engaging leadership show that when people experience autonomy, social support, and realistic job demands, engagement and well-being rise while burnout falls. Saying “I see the load you are carrying, and here is how we will help” creates powerful relational capital.
5. Create small, shared moments of joy and meaning. You do not need a big party to connect. Simple rituals, a brief gratitude circle in a staff meeting, a “wins of the year” board, a short story of impact from a student, client, or patient, help people feel emotionally connected to the team and its purpose. Social connection and shared purpose are key drivers of engagement and resilience, especially in high-stress seasons.
6. Share your own humanity appropriately. Effective presence is not a polished mask; it is grounded authenticity. Leadership presence research highlights that real influence flows from authenticity and integrity, not image management. When leaders appropriately share their own learning, challenges, or emotions, it normalizes vulnerability and invites more honest, trusting relationships.
7. Reconnect people to a hopeful future, and their role in it. Use this season to say, “Here is where we are headed, here is why it matters, and here is the unique contribution you make.” A future-focused, values-driven vision, combined with deep present-moment connection, is precisely what Kouzes describes. Research on engaging and purpose-driven leadership shows that when people see a meaningful future and how they fit into it, their engagement, innovation, and performance significantly increase.

When leaders do these things, they move from Clark Griswold’s dark, unplugged display to a fully lit house thanks to Ellen Griswald, where presence is bright, energy is contagious, and people feel genuinely connected. In this holiday season, the best “gift” followers can receive is a leader who proves, day after day, that “the best way to lead people into the future is to connect with them deeply in the present.”

The Leadership Question for you then is

Will you choose to be like Ellen Griswald and use one to three of the practices listed to be an authentic connector?

Will you be like Clark Griswold with lots of show and no connection?